Friday, 10 December 2010

You're Spoiling That Child!!!!!

I get this a lot. People keep telling me how I'm spoiling Lawi because I carry him and wear him most times - whether he's asleep or awake. I feel however, that babies can not be spoiled by being shown love and attention. See, this little guy came Earthside having been created and held in an ultimate hug in-utero, all warm, secure and cosy. It's all he knows, and leaving him in a  basket/cot/chair to cry is not an answer in getting him used to life out here or independent.

I will wrap him next to my body and help with a gentler transition. He's growing into it and is gradually feeling content and secure having a few minutes playing whilst sitting in his bouncy chair or gazing at the ceiling in bed, or marvelling at his mobile whilst being changed. Of course I'll pick him up as soon as he expresses the need to be. His independence is coming slow and he's setting the pace and the most important thing is that he feels safe, loved and secure in the process.

My parenting style is instinctive. I go with what I feel is right. I trust my instinct 100% and no 'expert' will tell me I'm doing it wrong and I listen to them - not when it feels so right. I've waited so long for this, I will go about it as nature intended, just like every mammalian animal does. Trust my feelings before I trust all else, even the most intelligently written books. Of course, I will read books on my chosen parenting style, but I take what feels right for us and leave what doesn't.

And what is this parenting style called? Oh, it's known to some as Attachment Parenting. I wear and carry my baby. We breast feed. We co-sleep. I follow his lead in everything - this is his life after all. We try to tread gently on this Earth, for the sake of our health as well as for the sake of the Earth, even if it makes just a minute difference. We use cloth nappies and wipes, and generally try to keep it all simple, clean and pure - even in London.

Parenting is not easy - these last 8 weeks have taught me that. However, it is the best job I've ever done. Very demanding - mentally, physically, psychologically, but also very, very rewarding. I'm thankful this little being chose me to be his mama on this Earth, and I look forward to and pray I can be the best I can to him for a long, long time.

Blessed be.
xxx

Edited to add this link, which I coincidentally found after I posted this entry:

It's dangerous to leave them crying, mum

2 comments:

  1. What a very sweet post! You are doing great, mama!

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  2. Thanks so much Jessica, learning as I go, and most of all, trusting my instinct.

    ReplyDelete