Well, I feel most spiritual meditating and in natural spaces. I've moved away from religion but I believe in a higher being - God/Mother Nature/The Universe. There's so much going on, something is skilfully orchestrating it. I believe in an after life and a life before this one. I could not name what I am though, as I get drawn to different aspects of different beliefs - Hindu and Buddhism for the meditative and awareness of body/mind link, Christianity for its comforting verses, especially the Psalms and during Christmas (I love the atmosphere and will attend carol concerts and Christingle ceremonies in church), Paganism for its 'witchery' with herbs and solstice celebrations and the whole respect for nature thing, which many religious beliefs seem to take for granted, Humanist for attaching importance to the human and respecting all, regardless, rather than divine or supernatural matters, although I strongly believe in the supernatural and divine too.
I also believe I can create my paradise right here in this life - nothing grand, but just being happy and satisfied with what I am and what I have, working at health for me and my loved ones, tilling my land, tending to my animals, relaxing in my uncluttered house... That is what spirituality is to me. Being happy, healthy, meditating, appreciating nature, respecting all, man and beast and the land we live in etc. Basically, being in the present, doing what religion asks people to do but without the spectre of burning in hell or anger from God or guilt at offending a divine being. Confused? Well, so am I, LOL! Well, this pretty much sums me up.Oh, and talking of life before and after this one... I felt really strongly that Laurence chose me to be his mum, and I thank him for that. Also, today marks the day my father died 2 years ago. I had just 2 days before, on the 2nd of Feb found out I was pregnant. Dad and I didn't get on in this life, but after my anger at him dying before we could work out our differences, I found myself actually conversing with him, and we solved our issues. Anger went, I felt no guilt, we were and still are in a good place. Al, whilst comforting me, said something at the time about just knowing this pregnancy will work - and it did after 4 miscarriages. He said dad gave our baby room to be here - like something had to give, and dad gave up his seat for Lawi, so to speak. My beloved granny died last May, and again, I feel her presence intermittently - no fear, no guilt, no anger. I miss them dearly but feel comforted in the fact we will have a reunion. I know all these may sound crazy to some but that's okay, we are complicated beings!
So, that's me, right now spiritually. I've not studied anything on a big scale so could be wrong in my mention of various practices, but this is where am at right now and it is subject to change. All I know is that I feel what I feel and work with it as I get it.
And on that note, I feel it's fitting to send my dad some good feelings today, on the second anniversary of his death. I miss you dad. Yet I feel your presence and that makes me know you are okay. Thank you for watching over us. Keep well, keep safe, stay good, till we meet again. Love a plenty.
Blessings to all
